A pocket full of Posey

Prepping for celiac test

2011-10-21T06:50:00.004-04:00

I went to the dr on Tuesday and got my script for celiac test. Do I think I have celiac? It's possible, but not probable. I just want to know. The problem is I have pretty much gluten free for a while, so in order for the test to be accurate, I have to add gluten back in my diet. I am in hell.

Everything I thought I missed tastes crappy. Granted, I am eating processed food like pizza, pretzels, and bread. I haven't had much processed stuff in the last year, so it's a dramatic change. I am counting the days until this test. The internet searches I've done indicate I need to eat the equivalent of 4 sliced of bread per day for three months. My response? FUCK NO.

In the four short days I have had gluten, my symptoms came screaming back. Rosacea? Check. Puffy face? Check. Exhaustion? Check. Muscle fatigue? Got it in spades. Aching joints? Absolutely. Feeling like there are bugs running around in my blood stream that are keeping me both hyper and unfocused? Oh yes. Asthma chest pains and shortness of breath? Got it.On Tuesday, my first gluten experience was pretzels. While I was eating them, my hands swelled up to the point that my rings were tight. Right before I ate the pretzels, my rings were so loose, that I was enjoying spinning them.

So I will continue to eat gluten until my team's potluck next week. I'm making my world famous pumpkin chocolate chip cookies and I would like to eat them one last time. And then I can get back to my almost grain free, protein and veggie filled lifestyle, no matter what the test says. I have a significant gluten issue that seems to be causing all of my autoimmune responses. If it turns out I have celiac, I have a script for Trinks to get tested. Then we can build the genetic tree. Fun.

Don't eat gluten and drive

2011-09-18T17:26:00.003-04:00

I am sooooooo stupid. I went out to a great restaurant last night. I knew I had to be really careful because I had to drive around 2 hours home. I got oil and vinegar on my salad to avoid the hidden gluten. I asked if the chicken was breaded. I neglected to skip the sauce that went with the chicken Florentine. I ate half of it before I realized there was gluten in it. I wrapped the other half for hubs. The service dropped off after we finished eating, so we left without coffee and dessert. By the time I got on the road (slight detour to the outlets), I was feeling muscle fatigue in my arms. I made the stupid decision to skip Wawa for coffee so I could just get on the road. The closer I got to home, the harder it was to keep my eyes open.

Before I started paying attention to how my body reacted to certain foods, this was a normal reaction to dinner. Hubs would usually drive home if we went out because I couldn't focus. I haven't felt this level of fatigue since I eliminated gluten. The part of this that bothers me is now I know better. I should have grilled the waiter (politely, of course) and mentioned that I have a problem with gluten. I need to learn how to ask these questions. I also need to stick with grilled meat, no sauce.

This morning I felt like I had been run over by a truck. It took me a while to get moving, but this afternoon, I feel so much better. I am not exhausted. I had eggs and sausage for breakfast with my Ezekial bread. For lunch, hubs and I finished the leftover chili verde. Then I got into cooking and preparing meals for the week. I have my energy back and I'm not even tempted by the apple cider donuts I bought at the apple festival yesterday. Gluten free has become so much easier. I do plan to ask my dr to test me when I see her on 10/18. We'll see how that goes.

Changes

2011-09-03T09:27:00.005-04:00

We've been traveling so much and the kids have been to various camps across the county and state that I haven't paused to track what I'm doing. I've become more and more interested in the paleo/primal world. Essentially, you eat like our ancestors did - meat, veggies and some fruit. No grains. Sound hard? If I still ate bread, maybe. But bread and pasta and other grain products are easy for me to forget because of how they make me feel. I've been more or less gluten free since the beginning of June. I had pizza in Galway NY and a few bites of gluten products at dinner later that week. I was ok with the pizza, but the 2nd experience wasn't good. A few weeks later, I had a donut. HOLY CATS! I was so miserable. Stomach cramps, fatigue and joint pain. Nothing like a horrible reminder of how shitty I used to feel. I do my best to avoid eating gluten, but I may end up having to eat it again if I decide to get tested for celiac. The only reason I would want to be tested is so I can definitively tell people I have celiac. If I mention I am avoiding gluten, no one takes me seriously. I hate that you have to add gluten back in to get a true test. I really wouldn't be surprised if I have celiac.

But, going forward, I am planning to string as many grain free days together as possible. I don't plan to be extremely strict, but my breakfasts and lunches are always grain free. Occasionally, I'll have a grain with dinner. Last night I had a wonderful risotto with shrimp and pesto. Do I regret it? Nope. I made the choice. There were plenty of options on the menu and I decided I was ok with having the rice.

Before we went on vacation, I challenged hubs to avoid gluten. Gluten causes so much inflamation in the body. Inflamation causes chronic disease. Hubs has already dealt with the symptoms of chronic disease, but I am not convinced the source was ever dealt with. Since the worst that could happen is he lost a few pounds, he agreed. I now have him addicted to Lara Bars, but only the ones with coconut in them. He is interested in pursuing this eating style since he dropped 3 pounds in 3 days. I may eventually get him to agree to get 1/6 of a grass fed/grass finished cow.

I think the most interesting part of this journey is watching the kids. They are so supportive of me. Trinks has expressed interest in eating fewer sandwiches and exploring more gluten free options. She has stomach pains every once in a while and I do wonder if she inherited my issue. S asked hubs if chocolate cake had gluten in it before he offered me a taste of his dessert. We are just slowly moving over to a healthier life style. Hubs even banned juice from the house! I was so impressed, because I put juice in the same category as milk - unnecessary. Juice, even 100% juice has way more sugar than the kids need. I don't have enough space to write why I hate milk, and if I did, the milk lobby would come after me. But the kids decided to drink half a jug of juice that hubs bought that morning. He told them he wouldn't buy it anymore. I replaced juice boxes with thermoses of unsweetened herbal fruit tea. Thank goodness for Celestial Seasoning's line of fruit teas. So far so good.

Getting the family onboard is a big challenge for me. Although most of our dinners are from scratch and using whole, fresh ingredients, some days we just don't have then energy to cook. We used to run to Dominos every other month because their pizza is really good for the price. Now if we do that, I still have to figure out what I am going to eat. It's not a big deal, but I just need to focus on planning and making sure we have the right stuff in the house. With hubs on board, I need to make sure he has breakfast, lunch and snack options available. I am organizationally challenged, but I hope as we get deeper and deeper into this lifestyle, it will get easier. I like making my own food. I think hubs and I cook things better than moderately priced restaurants do. As with all change, it takes time. And there is no time like the present to make these changes.

My personal war against chemicals

2011-07-07T07:19:00.002-04:00

As part of my journey towards health, I have learned a lot about how bad harsh chemicals are. I knew cleaners were bad, but I didn't realize how good simple vinegar and baking soda were. No harsh smells, and they get everything so clean!! I took a bizarre path when I read about making my own toothpaste.

I had just finished reading about how too much flouride causes osteoporosis. I figure that the amount of flouride I get from the gallons of tap water is sufficient. Then the next article I read was about homemade toothpaste. I had most of the ingredients, so I whipped up a batch. It tasted pretty nasty, but my teeth felt cleaner than when I went to the dentist! I was hooked. I added more peppermint oil and it tasted better, but still a little salty. I haven't used conventional toothpaste since I made it. It is awkward to put on a brush, but my teeth are so CLEAN!

My success with the toothpaste led to me make deoderant. I admit I didn't take it to Florida with me, but that's because the melting point for coconut oil is 76 degrees and I didn't want my container to leak. This stuff works so well! I used the second recipe and used arrowroot instead of corn starch. The only issue is it will detox the area and you may have 1-2 days of a detox rash. After that, everything is fine. My pits don't smell and I feel dry.

Next up is sunscreen, since most commercial brands are toxic. S is allergic to some of them, so I would like to find something better. Then I want to move on to bug spray. The big test of this will be our Galway trip. Mosquitos like to munch on us and we're tired of being the buffet. I'm having so much fun playing with this!!!

Gluten free is lonely

2011-06-11T20:58:00.002-04:00

I've been doing 80-90% gluten free. Obviously the weekdays are easier than weekends since I cook and prepare breakfast and lunch on Sundays and don't have to think too much on a daily basis. Traveling has messed me up since I haven't gotten the hang of traveling gluten free. Unrelated but interesting, I discovered I am allergic to bivalves. No great loss, but I can't get paella anymore. I think the problem I have is gluten is so undefined. It's the one allergy that is not required to show up on a food label because no one has defined what gluten is. Gluten is dusted on individually wrapped candies to make sure they don't stick to wrappers. Gluten is in salad dressing. It's in low fat dairy and many low fat products since they need to use crap to fill in the nutrients they remove when the create the low fat item. Ketchup, soy sauce and root beer contain gluten. Gluten can be called "modified food starch", hydrolized vegetable protein, malt, dextrins, and "natural flavoring".

The good news is most of the food items above are processed food and I shouldn't be eating them anyway. I've been making my own salad dressing for years. I make my own soup, eat very little low fat dairy (that's another post about the evils of the low fat diet), and I can't remember the last soda I drank. I hate ketchup and I've found gluten free soy sauce.

I think the best part of this long journey, which started before I realized gluten was killing me, is the impact to my immune system and allergies. I didn't get sick this year. No colds, no sinus infections. I haven't taken allergy medicine in 2 years. I used to snort Nasonex like it was going out of style. Now, I can get through allergy seaon without even sneezing. I also discovered that my blood pressure is finally coming down. For all my life, I had been a steady 110/70. Two years ago it started to creep up to 120/85. Not horrible, but not trending the way I want it. On Friday, in the middle of yet another workmans comp physical, my blood pressure was back to 112/78. I can live with that.

The real challenge in going gluten free is lack of education. Hubs is an awesome cook and he wouldn't do anything to hurt me. But, he thinks if he only puts a few breadcrumbs in a recipe, I will be fine. I won't be. I need the bread crumbs to be made from gluten free bread. From just a few breadcrumbs, I'll get stomach cramps and joint pain. I don't want anyone going out of their way to make me food - I really am fine. If I can't eat something, I simply won't eat it. I won't get mad. There are enough naturally gluten free foods that I can find.

Tomorrow I am going to test out some recipes from the Gluten Free Girl. Lemon olive oil cookies is up first. Then I'll find something from her beautiful cookbook. I bet I stain up the books before I return them to the library. I sense I'll buy both books this summer.

A bump in the road

2011-03-08T23:02:00.002-05:00

I found out the hard way that xanthum gum is not my friend. I made gluten free pizza crust this weekend. It tasted pretty good. I chickened out about making it completely from scratch and purchased a mix. I had a headache Sunday night. Since I hadn't been a model of great eating, I assumed it was from some of the extra crap I ate. All day yesterday I had a migraine. Tonight I had the leftover pizza for dinner on my way to Girl Scouts. Raging headache on the way home. I had no gluten or sugar today, so the common denominator was the gum. I know I can't handle processed foods, so this really isn't a surprise. Xanthum gum apparently is a bacteria combined with corn sugars - why would anyone eat that??? I'll take a gluten reaction over a migraine any day. At least I'm learning. Slowly but surely, I am learning.

A better week

2011-02-27T21:22:00.003-05:00

Last week was another tough week. We were booked every night, but thankfully the snow cancelled Girl Scouts. Trinks completed her science project and did an awesome job with it. The problem is, all the candy parts of the plant cell melted into the cytoplasm (lime jello) by the end of the day so I have no pictures. Trinks is doing so well at the new school that I am writing the check for next year for both kids. I have seen such an improvement in her attitude about school and her happiness is off the charts. She stumbled briefly with math, but has caught right up. She's also gotten nothing less than 110% in spelling - he last teacher told me she couldn't spell. Now I think she was bored and not trying.

Last week I forgot to figure out my breakfast. That was kind of important. I split the days between rice chex and Ezekiel bread. I like them both, but I try not to have a lot of processed food. This week I have leftover jambalaya and veggie soup. Today was the kind of day that I would have killed for two more crockpots. I cooked my garbanzos first as the chicken bones roasted. Then I swapped the beans for the carcas and made some amazing chicken stock. The jambablaya was cooking in the "good" crock, so I had to make my soup on the stove - GASP! I put together the quiche (broccoli and bacon) for tomorrow night. The crust does have gluten in it. This week I am doing my research and finding recipes for pie crust and pizza crust. I will play over the weekend. The other highlights of the week are: Tuesday - sandwich night, Wednesday - bacon wrapped meatloaf, Thursday - spaghetti (for me it will be quinoa pasta as soon as I track it down), and Friday - glutenfree pretzel chicken. Gluten free pretzels are so good, hubs eats them if I don't hide them. They are, however, a million bucks a bag. I love the sesame seed rounds, but they are almost impossible to find.

Yes, it's a little boring to list our dinners, but I want to track as much of the menu as possible so I can review if I slip. For snacks I have been enjoying raw almonds, raw Brazil nuts, and raw pumpkin seeds. S is allergic to the Brazil nuts, but they are so amazing. I want to check out raw macadamia nuts next.

Well - this week is definitely better planned and prepared than last week. I didn't spend the entire day in the kitchen, although it felt like it. I cleared several flower beds and I look forward to expanding a section for our veggies this year. Composting has been great, so I think we can liven up the nasty clay dirt we have. Next up is moving some shrubs so we can see the bird feeder better from the dining room table. It's our dinner time entertainment.

Oy.

2011-02-21T22:43:00.002-05:00

It's been a hell of a month. A coworker, who I had known for 11 years died. I am sick about it. She battled breast cancer for 10 years and then it spread to her brain. She left behind two beautiful daughters; one in high school and the other in college. I am so sick of breast cancer taking away my friends. There seems to be no end in sight.

In terms of the gluten free diet. Well, ummm, hmmmm.... I haven't been as vigilant as I started out. And I feel like crap. My hands are swollen. My face has broken out and I have rosacea. A couple of weeks ago my skin was clear and really nice. I had a lot of gluten, sugar and dairy this weekend and it feels like I swallowed razor blades. I got the message loud and clear. Time to go nuts with unprocessed foods. This week is a tough schedule, but I think I can do it.

Tonight Trinks came into the room and showed me her belly. She has erythema multiforme. LOVELY. I've had it at least 4 times and only learned the last time what works. I gave her coconut oil to rub on the hives and some benadryl. I know vitamin C worked for me, as well as a few other supplements. We'll try more things tomorrow. I made her put on a tank top, put her hair up and drop her comforter. Hopefully keeping cool will help contain the rash. Tomorrow morning we'll evaluate and see where we need to go with it. The dr. can't do anything for it - steroids don't work and there's really nothing else to do for it. I just need to monitor the symptoms to make sure it doesn't turn into Stevens Johnson syndrome. It's a very rare possibility, but I am prepped with the symptoms. I am itching as well, so I really think this is food related. Trinks and I will discuss possible delayed food reactions. Wiki points to benzoates - yes - go check your cabinet. See how many boxes have a benzoate as a preservative. It can also be caused by fungus, and since I am on the FUPO wagon (Fungus Until Proven Otherwise), I tend to believe this one. We'll see what tomorrow brings.

Rice and Beans, Beans and Rice

2011-01-27T12:34:00.002-05:00

No - it's not a new diet craze, although I did start week 4 down 18.2 pounds. It's one of my favorite Dave Ramsey sayings. We finally resolved Trinks' school issue. We removed her from public school. I swear Karen is somewhere laughing at me because she refused to live in DE due to the school systems. I was was the right combination of optimistic and lazy, so I thought we'd be fine. WRONG!

So now we are shelling out a crapload of cash to send the kids to private school as well as get on a bus to kung fu. Is it worth it? Absolutely! Trinks bounds out of bed to get dressed, pack her lunch and help her brother. She comes home is a great mood and doesn't yell at us when we work with her on her homework. She is very pleasant to be around. I didn't realize how bad the situation was at the old school, but I am so happy we moved her.

So this move puts my financial goals on hold for this year. I am working on a budget now that should allow us to travel, but not run through our emergency fund. We need new tires for both cars, possibly a new heating/ac unit, and some basic home repairs. In the spring, I will most likely start looking for a new job, as I am severely underpaid for my skillset. I am also working on some food plans that include a lot of beans and rice, rice and beans. Back to being uber frugal and owning each dollar.

Week 2 update

2011-01-16T21:50:00.003-05:00

I've been very busy lately. Work is insane, but it always is in January. I've had a bit more energy, so I've been more productive when I get home. A lot of my free time is spent in the kitchen chopping, cutting, and portioning meals and snacks. The drawback of eating ingredients, as Trinks calls them, is there is nothing to just grab in a time crunch. We had a meal foul up this week and it was a struggle to find something to replace it. I'm still on board because I am down 16 pounds and love eating this way. Go me!

I've noticed a few things during these two weeks. I love cabbage. I really love cabbage. As a kid, I hated cabbage in all forms. Several years ago I decided to add purple cabbage to my salad because it looks pretty. Still hated it, but knew it was healthy so I added it. Now I love it. I love it sauteed, in soup, in cole slaw (without mayo - ick poo), raw - any form at all. I like green and purple. So this week, my veggie soup is chock full of cabbage and I made some slaw with sesame oil (heavenly) and rice vinegar with salt, pepper and garlic. I've also noticed that pretty much everyone likes what I make for dinner. No, I did not force my curried cauliflower down anyone's throat, but the regular meals are pretty darn good. I also put onions and garlic in everything and we are constantly running out of them. And my crockpot is amazing.

Tomorrow starts week 3. I am completely prepared for it. Tonight we had shredded chicken tacos. I had the chicken over lettuce with a tomotillo sauce and chopped avocados. The family had regular tacos. Tomorrow the kids are trying lentils in Moroccan Chicken over lentils. Tuesday is sandwich night and Wednesday is Pioneer Dinner. That would be sausage with potatoes, carrots, and onions. S will be in heaven. Thursday is another chicken dinner and Friday is Parents Night Out, so we're going to the Cheesecake factory. With a plan, anything is possible.

I am moving the budget/financial goals up to the next priority. Trinks is getting pulled out of her miserable school and placed in a better school. The new school costs money. So financial goal may change as we figure out where the cash is coming from. But in good news, Trinks brought home the highest state reading score in her grade. She blasted through to Advanced. Next week is the math. And somehow we have to move her to the new school in the next 2 weeks. Life is an adventure.

Challenge #1 - Passed!

2011-01-07T22:08:00.002-05:00

So for meal out #1, I did great. I had a really great spicy steak salad and didn't get any dressing, even on the side. The dressing was ginger/soy, which I love, but soy sauce has wheat in it, so I declined. The meat and sauteed veggies lent enough moisture to make dressing completely unnecessary.

Today's total of weight lost is 13.2. Yesterday I noticed that I didn't have asthma chest pains when I walked outside in the cold. My random joint pain is gone. I have energy. Five days down, 23 to go with the challenge. In 23 days, I'll decide the next steps, but this eating style is very maintainable. And delicious.

The next challenge is dinner out in Philly. I don't know where we are going, but I know I can find something on the menu. Then I have lunch in NYC. I checked out the menu and picked out a really good salmon salad. I'll hold the dill sauce, but go for the slaw. They don't use mayo (ick poo) so it's really good. Tomorrow I will prepare my breakfast for while I am away as well as setting up next week for breakfast and lunch. Our menu for the week? Here it is.

Monday - Apple Chicken
Tuesday - sandwich night for the family, I will eat leftovers on the way to Girl Scouts.
Wednesday - Shrimp and Asparagus stir fry
Thursday - Lime Ginger chicken
Friday - Orange chicken

***order subject to change upon mood.

All of these will be served with veggies that the kids pick out. The family will eat rice, baked potatoes, or rolls. I'll have either brown rice or quinoa, both of which I make ahead of time and heat up when needed.

Day 4 of my Health goals

2011-01-06T07:07:00.003-05:00

I have been eating more veggies than I ever have in my life, and I've always ate lots of vegetables. The only grain I am eating this week is quinoa - with almond milk and blueberries. It looks moldy, but tastes great. I have avoided all processed food, although almond milk is probably considered processed. I've had no sugar - coffee black with cinnamon. No sweets.

I've been weighing myself every morning just to keep my focus. The first day I was down 3 pounds - nice! Day 2 - I jumped on the scale. I rubbed my eyes. Jumped off. Reset the scale. Got back on. Squinted at the scale. Shook my head. Jumped off. Reset and got back on. It was true - down 10 pounds. This morning I am down another pound. I know it's the water weight and all that, but damn! It's keeping me on track. My goal is to lose around 50 pounds before we go to Disney in June. I am on my way!!!!

My challenge: This weekend we are going out to eat several times. I need to remain focused. I also need to prepare for next week like I prepared for this week. When I have a plan, I can do anything.

2011 Goals

2011-01-02T21:44:00.003-05:00

Before I get to the goals, can I cross "find mouse" off if I bought a mouse for the other computer (which I managed to kill in less than 24 hours of opening the box)? While you ponder that question, here are my ideas for this year.

Health. I plan to work on my overall health this year. My numbers are great - cholesterol 143 (ratio is off because the LDLs are 40) and my glucose is 85 whether I am fasting or not. My blood pressure is creeping up from the standard 110/70 and I want to keep it back in the safe zone. My weight, of course, needs some work. So to accomplish better overall health and deal with some food sensativities, I am eliminating processed foods from my diet. I have been feeling like absolute crap lately and I have pinpointed it to after I eat gluten, white sugar, eggs and corn syrup. The symptoms aren't too specific, but random radiating pain, joint aches and muscle fatigue seem to sum it up. The key is, the symptoms go away when I eliminate these things from my diet. If they stuck around, it would be a different plan of attack, such as SEE A DOCTOR FOR PETE'S SAKE!

Over the last year or so, I have done a TON of reading. No one author really fit with what I hoped to accomplish. Dr. Mark Hyman has great books about inflamation, but I don't like some of his food suggestions. The raw movement is great, but I can't stay on it indefinitely. I love how I feel with the green shakes and salads full of colorful vegetables. I just need some cooked meat or sauteed veggies every once in a while. Doug Kaufman and Leann Ely have plans that seems to incorporate what I need and can continue for the rest of my life. So today I chopped, cooked, and chopped some more so I have a week's worth of breakfast and lunches ready for my lunch box. It's good food - a nice veggie soup in a chicken broth with a salad for lunch, quinoa with bluberries and almond milk for breakfast. I'll throw some green shakes in for fun. There is supposed to be a variety for all meals, but I have to do the same all week in order to get it all done. I'll change is up next week. Dinners are simple meals that the whole family will like, such as chicken and apples, Jambalaya, and Mediterranean chicken. Tuesday remains sandwich night for them, so they won't suffer too much. I'll see how this goes and tweak it as I get a better idea of where I want to go.

Hubs wants to improve his health, too. He mentioned that his clothes are getting tight too. We discussed what his approach is going to be. He's fond of the processed low cal food and has been successful with losing weight that way. So we got him his Rice Crispies and skim milk and deli meat and salad. For once we are working on this project together and can work together when one of us feels weak.

Finance As usual, we have some financial goals. After I paid off the car 3 years early, I lost my focus. Now I need to focus to kick the Home Equity Loan to the curb this year. Debt makes me really nervous, so the mortgage is the next target. It's a small amount each month, but I hate being in a position of owing someone! With one child in private school and another probably going there next year, it will be a challenge. But I love Dave Ramsey, Suze Orman and Gail Vaz Oxlade. Their words of wisdom and awesome shows and podcasts will help me refocus on getting out of debt.

Education Trinks needs a new school. Her cirriculum is weak and will not prepare her for middle school. I need a new school for 5th grade (or sooner)and then I will be happy with the 6-8 school. They finally let kids get left behind in middle school, so she can get in tracked classes. Her standardized test scores indicate she'll be in advanced math and reading. She has had no homework in math and no book reports or research report for any subject. She will die in middle school without these skills. If she gets too overwhelmed, she'll stop trying. I currently supplement her crappy homework. I had to beg the teacher for help. He's wonderful and probably thinks I am a nutcase. But in my defense, he sent home the wrong report card and almost gave me a nervous breakdown. I didn't know how I could have been so out of touch with my child's grades.

My education goal is to complete my Tax Ceritifaction. No, I don't want to go to class anymore. I learned that I would have to reimburse my company for the class I took and decided I can suck it up and go to class for the next 1.5 years. I'm too cheap to drop out. It should look good on a resume. If my pay doesn't start matching my skill, I'll need a strong resume.

I have some random house and family goals, but I haven't fleshed them out. They include getting more involved in scouts and kung fu. Perhaps hubs and I will join the kids? I plan to continue to declutter and become a minimalist. Who knows where this year will take us. I have the framework. We'll see what we can accomplish.

The road to 40

2011-01-01T14:26:00.002-05:00

I just turned 39. The real 39. I never lie about my age because I think people who try to say they are younger are idiots. I mean it you are 39 and try to tell people you are 30, they are going to think you look really crappy for 30. I earned each year and I am not ashamed of my age. Then comes FORTY. In 11.5 months I will be the dreaded 40. And how do I feel about that? I really feel that the 40s will be better than the 30s. I spent the 20's trying to sort out a career, figuring out how much of a goober I really was and then starting to have kids. The 30s were spent raising those kids to school age. Now they barely need us, except to run them from activity to activity. Not better, just different.

So the road to forty. I always pictured freaking out over turning 40. In 4th grade, we read a story called The Milestone. The family gave the mother a surprise party (so help me if anyone does that for me, I will kill them) because the mother was sad about turning 40. It focused on how half of her life was over. Pretty morbid crap for 4th graders to read. They way I see it, I'll have spent 40 years figuring stuff out, so the rest of my years will be smoother. This is my decade to shine. Let's just not talk about turning 50.

Sometime this weekend, or even later today, I am posting my goals for the year. I hope to reach 40 a healthier, happier, wealthier woman. Go me. Of course my first goal is to find my missing mouse so I can do some time suck games on Facebook.

To vote or not to vote

2010-10-26T21:39:00.002-04:00

Of course I'm voting - gotta keep the witch with a capital B out of office. I would prefer to run her out of the state so she could embarrass a new state. But the more important election is for the state representative. I love the guy we currently have. He went door to door 2 years ago and spent significant time talking about education with me. I am currently facing an education crisis of epic proportions (have I mentioned I exaggerate???) and would feel comfortable showing up at his open office sessions to discuss my concerns. Tonight I met his competition. The guy is really nice and he paved our really crappy road 2 years ago. I thanked him for that, but forgot to tell him to st.op sending me birthday cards - too much of a waste of trees and money.

So what is my point? My point is we have two really great guys running for office. I think they would both be a great choice. I applaud the fact that they go door to door to make the effort to meet everybody. Isn't this what real politicians should be? They were polite about the opposition, but pointed out why they would be better. I'm just impressed that this close to election day there is civility

So proud of my Trinks

2010-08-25T22:12:00.008-04:00

Today I took Trinks to the Adirondack Extreme Adventure course. She did some low ropes in Girl Scout camp this summer and asked if she could do the high ropes camp next year. I saw a commercial for this place, decided it looked awesome, so away we went. And by the way, Trinks is terrified of heights.

We bribed S to come with us since my mother wanted to watch Trinks. Note to self - next time, leave her in the cabin so she doesn't stress out. As we approached the Bolton Landing exit, it was raining. Lovely. We arrived at this place and stayed in the car while watching people climb and do the zip line. I am a first class coward, but I was getting pretty excited watching what people were doing. We checked in, grabbed the harness and waited for the training to begin. Then it was time for the demo course. Trinks did GREAT on all the parts leading to the zip line. For some reason, the zip terrified her. A guide jumped up and rescued her.

Then it was time for the real course. Although she was tall enough for the adult course, we kept her on the kids course. The real reason for this is I wasn't about to go up in the trees, and I could watch from the ground if she stayed on the kids' course. Trinks hesitated a few times, but for the most part did great. Then it was time for the short zip line to the ladder down. Ummmm..... didn't quite work out as planned and her knight in shining poncho rescued her again.

So, here are my notes for next year. I need to get in shape to do the adult ropes with her. Or her cousins need to join her. If she had someone in the trees with her, I think she would have felt better. All in all, it was a worthwhile experience. I am so proud of her for stepping out of her comfort level and pushing herself to complete the course. Afterwards, we bought her a patch and took her to the playground. S was all pumped up from watching her that he climbed around like a monkey. He kept saying that the playground equipment was exactly like the high ropes. Not exactly, but there was a lot of climbing stuff. And then we went for ice cream.

Finally good service

2010-08-11T21:35:00.003-04:00

S gained enough weight to grow into a real epi pen instead of the epi pen Jr. This was back in May. I justified not filling the prescription because they cost (I thought) $40/pen. And I figured in the event of a real emergency I could just give him 2 shots. I know - not smart. I had a supermom lunch the other day and ran several errands. When I dropped off the prescription at Happy Harry's, I informed the young, uninterested mumbling clerk that if the expiration date was under a year, I didn't want it. I then asked if I could get 2 at the same time. I got blank eyes and a mumbled "depends on your insurance".

Fast forward a few hours. Hubs and I picked S up, hit the drive though at Happy Harry's. We were told to pay $111. As I slowly slid into a panic attack, I opened the bag. The mumbling dude hooked us up! We got 2 epi pen sets with a 15 month expiration. So for as much as I complain about lousy service, I figured I should showcase something good.

Getting ready to miss my Trinks again

2010-08-08T06:32:00.004-04:00

Trinks was upset when I picked her up on Friday. Her two best buddies switched to day camp for next week and she wanted to switch as well. I knew this was coming, so I told her we would discuss it later. The whole ride home was a non stop conversation of the cool things she did. I got a few sentences in so I could tell her what I had planned for the weekend. She got excited when I told her we're going out to breakfast (and even more excited when she convince hubs we had to go to IHOP). Then she made a little request - at some time could we get Rita's or ice cream? I think that's fair enough and we'll do that after lunch today. I think she really misses all the family stuff.

As much as Trinks has loved camp, I think I'm doing things a little different next year. Camp Grandma includes parents next year, or so I have been told. We're going to Disney. In the summer. At least for that week Trinks will have us. She can do a few more weeks of kung fu camp with S. She really wants to go to a traveling camp that includes white water rafting and traveling on a zip line. Come February, I may for get these plans as I see the exciting camp brochure. Hopefully Trinks will remember so we get to see a bit more of her next year.

We made sure Trinks had a good time this weekend. All the back to school shopping is done, except Target ran out of composition notebooks and Trinks needs 3 more. Since she FINALLY tie dyed her t-shirt, we went to Joann Fabric to get some patches to iron on. I did that last night as S asked me what that thing was. Yes - it was the iron. He's never seen me use one before. Trinks was so tired she passed out in our bed while watching TV last night. Hopefully she'll sleep late (8AM) today. I want her well rested for her last week of camp!

I really hate other people

2010-08-06T19:30:00.002-04:00

I don't think it's a secret that I really hate other people. It's probably the reason I have a job where I don't interact with clients face to face. This afternoon I had two instances of really shitty service. These people should find other jobs.

At Girl Scout camp, I waited in line to sign Trinks out. I don't mind waiting. As soon as I got up, some bitch interrupts the line to ask a question. I'm sorry, I waited to get uniterrupted time in checking out. Now the counselor lost her focus and didn't end up giving me the proper paperwork. Why do people think they are above the rules? Then I picked S up and took the kids to the grocery store. The stupid cashier had a private conversation going as she checked out the woman in front of me. She never asked the woman if she wanted cash back because she wasn't paying attention. The woman was annoyed. At my turn, there was an error message on the screen that she ignored for 5 minutes while she was carrying on with her friend. I then went on to have a very civil discussion with the kids as to why this behavior was unacceptable. In front of the woman. Don't worry - she was so wrapped up in her personal conversation she didn't know.

I understand this is the world we live in. It's related to rude cell phone use. I understand that people are going to play with their phones during dinner - I see that all the time. Hubs and I went out to dinner one night and noticed a couple seated almost across from us. After they ordered, she got on the phone and proceeded to TALK through the whole meal. She ate and talked and ignored her husband. And it wasn't an emergency. It was plain old gossip. I'm sorry - this is so unacceptable. Why did she bother going out to dinner? She could have had shit on a shingle for all she tasted the meal. Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I ignore my phone at a restaurant or with friends. Obviously there are exceptions for when I am expecting a call, but I put more importance on the person in front of me. Anything else is uncivilized.

Trinks melts down

2010-08-03T21:21:00.002-04:00

Trinks was in NYC all week last week. We got her back Friday night and I spent most of the day at the 3 Day Expo on Saturday. On Sunday we had to take her to camp for the week. We did the usual lines of check in (lice and fungus check is my favorite) and ended up in the meadow. Once in the meadow, the girls meet their counselors and sing all the crazy Girl Scout songs. This is where we give Trinks hugs and kisses and go back home. We were almost halfway to the car when I heard thundering footsteps behind me. I turned and Trinks grabbed me and she was barely breathing. She was so upset she was in the middle of a panic attack.

Trinks doesn't get panic attacks much, but they scare the shit out of me. She just can't breathe. I feel like smacking her just to reset the cycle. I got her back breathing and then she told me she missed me so much. My heart melted a bit because my child has never really missed me in her entire life. I know she's going to have a blast learning how to play guitar, so I felt confident with my pep talk of "suck it up and put a smile on your face. Fake it until you make it and have some fun. If you really like the guitar, you can ask for one for Christmas." Yup - that's me. All the warm fuzzies a girl can want. Now I'm sure I have to make good on my promise about a guitar. Thankfully I came home and Amazon has some nice ones that won't break the bank.

But, to make up for lost time, Trinks and I are going back to school shopping this weekend. Normally we do this when we go to Galway, but I think we need a girls day before her final week of camp. I may even drive an hour to go to Target. I may even buy the Pottery Barn backpack she wants. I am a sucker to see my kid happy. If anyone wants to help make her final week fabulous, let me know and I'll send you her camp address.

Kitty is not dying

2010-08-03T21:15:00.002-04:00

So at the beginning of the summer, we believed that Kitty was dying. She's 14 years old and looked really bad. She dropped to around 6 pounds from a high of 11. We could easily see her ribs. We fully expected to come home to a dead cat after our Rhode Island trip. She wasn't dead, but she wasn't healthy either. We decided to try something to help ease her last days. We gave her canned fish - salmon and tuna. By giving her and Forrest the fish a couple times a week, both have had improved health.

While I'm not sure Kitty has that much longer with us, it's nice to see the old girl with a spark in her eyes again. She's put on a pound or two, and looks pretty good.

Last Friday was a day for miracles

2010-08-02T21:10:00.002-04:00

At an undisclosed location, deep in the heart of an unnamed state, Ivy had angioplasy. Why is this such a secret operation??? It's because she has MS. Angioplasty is not an approved treatment for MS. Big Pharm is discouraging studies because it may mean people may stop needing the drugs. The horror! But politics aside, Ivy is seeing dramatic improvement with her fatigue. Read all about it here for the surgery and here for recovery. I don't know much, but I believe patients have the right to make well informed decisions about their health.

Later that night, dear friends had a baby a few weeks early. He's had some lung problems, but he looks adorable and he keeps getting stronger everyday. I can't wait to meet the little guy!

I love a man in uniform

2010-07-29T21:52:00.002-04:00

Ok - I love that my five year old has to wear a uniform next year. I love the school we found for him. I don't love paying for school, though. He passed the 1st grade entrance test in two different schools; however, neither were public school. He was on the waiting list for the school closest to us, but we like the second school we found as much, if not more. This whole battle - and it has felt like war - is so ridiculous. I swore that I would never send my kids to private school. There is no need. Then I had a child who was born in November.

S completed kindergatern last year. He did really well. Public school wouldn't even look at him unless we put him in kindergarten again. I did my research to see what he needed to know, what social milestones he needed to hit before he could move to first grade. I had to ignore a ton of people who told me I was wrong. I was told to let him repeat kindergarten because he was a boy and he would be better in sports if I held him back. SPORTS? Really? What the fuck is that about? I don't give a shit about a sports career. I care about education. I will not base my son's life on possible sports issues. It's called priorities, people.

And in the interest of full disclosure, I have a December birthday. I was a full year older than my classmates and hated it. Wow - I could drive earlier than my friends. Guess what that means? I got to pay for the gas to drive them around. I was also taller than all my friends - almost a foot taller than some. Would that have been different if I was with kids my age? Maybe. Would the teachers have treated me as if I was a regular kid if I was with kids my age? I hated being last for everything - size place order was the rage at the time. And who knows, maybe I would have worked harder if I had been challenged in school. I came into kindergarten reading chapter books and it was a battle to get the teacher to allow me to read something more than baby books when we went to the library.

So am I letting my emotions help me make my decision? You're god damned right I am. It's the little things that you can't quantify that create your school life. It may mean I keep S in private school until he completes 5th grade. I think he will thrive at this school, as much as his sister is thriving at public school. My only issue with Trinks' school is there are ignorant fake Christians who won't be friends with her because she's not Christian. I guess they haven't found Jesus yet. Trinks is outgoing and doesn't get lost in a class of 25. S might. So we shall see where this trip into private school leads us.

So now I am off to spend my life savings on khakis and navy pants with light blue, navy and white (white - really?) polos. I am planning to avoid the urge to dress him in button down Oxfords, even though he looks adorable in them. The good news is I can get rid of most of his clothes now. He'll only have 2 days to wear non uniform clothes. How many things does he really need????

I walk alone

2010-07-26T10:28:00.002-04:00

Yup - alone in a sea of 3,000 other people. And I know one person walking with her mother. She'll be the one in pink.

I'm talking about my 4th Breast Cancer 3 Day walk. My walking partner isn't able to walk with me this year and it's a bit too late to guilt someone into walking with me. Walking alone, while initially terrifying, is completely liberating. I don't have to tell anyone I have to pee - I can just go without worrying about annoying anyone. I can take a nap at lunch it I want to and not worry about holding anyone up. Neither of these things happened before, but I am trying to psych myself up for this. The best thing is I get to camp with the crazy people known as the crew. They work hard and are always smiling and helpful. My tentmate is a tent decorating queen and I look forward to getting a ribbon for the best decorated tent. I believe all I have to contribute are a few training bras and a flag. Can't wait to see what we get this year.

So in between psyching myself for the walk, I have been training. I'm happy that I started early this year because the humidity is killing my lungs. I can't walk when the air is thick because I can't breathe. Even with my inhaler, my lungs BURN! I was able to kick out a few walks while in RI, but I just couldn't do much more. This AM I was able to get 4 miles in before I go into work late. The air quality was near perfect and my lungs didn't burn. I'll drag my lazy ass out of bed to walk again tomorrow to take advantage of this rare event. I'm hoping we get the nice humidity-free air when we hit Galway in a few weeks. I like to do some nice, long walks when we're there. I know I can do the walking - I just need to get some good numbers up there before the event.

Am I being paranoid?

2010-07-18T10:57:00.002-04:00

Trinks is really offended that I make her ride in a booster seat and she is 9 years old. She's also 87 pounds. Why do I force her to ride in a booster seat when all of her friends are out of one? (And for the record, she was rear facing for 15 months.) We went to the Da Vinci Science Museum last year when I was getting ready to remove the booster seat. One of the displays mentioned children should be in booster seats until they are 4'9". Trinks is now about 4'6". Since she's begging me, I spent some time researching the issue.

This link confirms the 4'9" recommendation. But I checked how the seatbelt hits Trinks when she is not in a booster seat and it does hit her shoulder. I admit I am not consistent with making her use a booster. For the ride to her after school program, she is not in a booster. She was actually in a hit and run accident (the third car accident she's been in) in that vehicle, but thankfully no one was hurt. So I guess I can't wrap her in bubble wrap for the rest of her life. If hubs ever wakes up, we can discuss what to do next.

My date with S

2010-07-18T10:22:00.007-04:00

I love spending time alone with each child. Trinks was at a sleepover, and S is an early riser, so he and I went IHOP. Then we went to the park. We couldn't stay long because at 9AM it was already unbearably HOT.

Twilight I can appreciate

2010-07-16T20:28:00.003-04:00

I think it’s no secret that I HATED the Twilight series after the first book. While reading the second book, I desperately wanted Bella to die a tortuous death. A co-worker talked me into reading the last 2 books and they were ok. But this has to be the funniest thing I have ever seen.

I was reading Jen Lancaster’s book Bright Lights, Big Ass in the café today. I just about choked several times to prevent myself from bursting into peals of laughter. People would have stared and talked about me. More than usual, I mean. I like this book more than the first book - Bitter is the New Black. It is funny as well. I just seem to like this more.

Seafood withdrawal

2010-07-11T16:26:00.009-04:00

Yesterday we had a wonderful trip to Mystic CT on the way home. We missed all the traffic and the rain, plus it was a beautiful day. Trinks wore her new Peace, Love, Lobsters shirt. We finished the trip with a last seafood lunch. Trinks and I had amazing fish and chips. Hubs and his dad had a clam roll. My mother in law had a great looking lobster roll. I did manage to leave my purse there - a sure sign it's not time to go home. It was a sign that we should have stayed another week.

A nice beach day

2010-07-08T17:43:00.005-04:00

All S wanted to do was go back to the "fake house" and play his DS. He did get me out in the ocean and we tumbled.

Rough surf today. And there was tons of seaweed.

Our awesome tent. If we went to the beach more, I would get one.

And a second set of glasses was broken

2010-07-08T09:00:00.004-04:00

Trinks' new glasses have broken twice in the last two months. This time the screw fell out and none of us could fix it. I took her to Vision World down the street and begged for help. While there I noticed their special - 2 full pair of glasses for $99. With thoughts of camp, I had Trinks pick out 2 frames. Yesterday we picked them up. These are the old - and a great picture of Trinks' new nano.

These are the new. The other new pair is the same as the old, but they are purple. Hopefully we can get through a year with three pair.

2010-07-06T23:46:00.004-04:00

S be nimble, S be quick

2010-07-06T08:37:00.001-04:00

S jumps over boogie board.

Poison, part 3

2010-06-29T16:51:00.002-04:00

Today I had my 3rd exposure to toxins at work. This time I was so sick, I went to the workman's comp doctor. This time the workers opened Kem Bond on the roof, right next to the intake duct and the whole building was toxic. Strange that there was no communication or evacuation. There were 3 floors of sick people and building services couldn't clear the air fast enough. I tried to stay at work, but I was so dizzy that I found it hard to walk. Had I known how annoying the workman's comp center was, I never would have gone. The upside? I am not allowed back at work until I get a follow up visit tomorrow. I should have scheduled a later appointment!

Summer!!!

2010-06-26T21:04:00.002-04:00

It's been a busy summer, although summer just started last week. S has been out of school for a month. He enjoyed his first week alone at kung fu. He woke up early every morning, threw his lunch together, packed his backpack, and ate breakfast without needing a reminder. Amazing. Trinks just finished her first week of overnight camp. She loved it. She rode horses for three days and did camp activities the rest of the time. The tie dye class was closed, so she tried the low ropes. She swam. There was a slip and slide. One night there were s'mores. She came home exhausted but happy. I mentioned her next Girl Scout session was day camp and she started crying because she wants to go overnight again. I reminded her that the following week was the Decadent Dessert camp. She'll stay in a cabin and bake all week.

The kids are leaving for a week in Massachusetts with their cousins and grandparents. Pray for my mother. She has three on medication (Trinks is yellow level asthma from camp and my neice and nephew are on nebulizers), S has the epi pen in case of accidental allergic contact, and the 5th child is recovering from a double break in his upper arm. They plan to hike a lot, and find a ton of interesting places to explore. We'll pick them up at the Dinosaur State Park in CT in a week. We're headed to Rhode Island. Trinks will celebrate her 9th birthday while we're there. I can't believe how fast she's growing up!!! I just found out that the Mumbles will be in RI while we're there, so we'll be at their show on her birthday. She is so excited.

Hubs and I are hanging on for rough ride this summer. Hubs has an extremely inflexible schedule, so I will spend most of the summer schlepping the kids around. The high point is going to Girl Scout camp. It is so beautiful down there! If I move, I will move to the Cecilton area. It looks like NJ used to before the New Yorkers moved in and destroyed the state. Trinks has already objected to that idea, but I'll keep it in the back of my mind.

June accomplishments

2010-06-19T21:38:00.005-04:00

June is way busier than December. We made it to the Greek Festival this year - go us! Trinks made honor roll - major accomplishment.

S earned his purple gold belt and performed in the graduation ceremony. Trinks earned her blue purple sash, but skipped the graduation ceremony to attend the Junior Achievement Girls Scout overnight. It was an amazing trip where she got a job and learned how to manage money. See what I mean by busy?

Today S had his Tumblebus recital. It was pretty cool to see him showing off his skills. We'll miss the bus next year!

Trinks flew up to Juniors in an amazing ceremony during the year end banquet. The ceremony for the 63 girls (Brownies, Juniors and Cadets) moved at a nice pace. I loved watching the girls cross the bridge, pausing in the middle to make a wish. Once dinner was done, the DJ took song requests and the girls danced their hearts out. I have a ton of sewing to do - she got all the badges she earned this year today. AWESOME!

You're arms ain't broke

2010-06-15T22:17:00.002-04:00

S got the shock of his life. He realized he had to make his own lunch for camp. He looked up at me and asked me to make his lunch for him. I responded - you're arms ain't broke!! He's not as independent as Trinks and is a little reluctant to try new things. The problem is, once we finally get him to try new things, he loves them. So he and Trinks stood side by side and churned out 5 sandwiches each. For the last two days, they've been putting their snacks with the sandwich and filling their water bottles. Hopefully it will be smooth sailing for the rest of the summer.

Now if we can get him to clean the litter boxes while Trinks is away.....

To school or not to school

2010-06-13T09:42:00.002-04:00

I have an awesome opportunity to take classes for a tax certification in the fall. I know - YAWN! I have to front the cash, but I will be reimbursed. The cool thing is the school comes to us. One of the sort of local universities in PA is coming to our BFC. Based on how the courses are set up, it will take 2 years to complete. My two questions are: will I get additional money when I complete the course and how long do I have to stay at the BFC after I complete the certification? The last certification I earned resulted in no extra money, so I have no hope for this one. I know how much I am worth on the open market, so I just need to know how long I have to stay. Barring any crazy issues, it looks like I am going back to school.

Things I learned spending 3 days at home

2010-06-09T12:01:00.002-04:00

I am in the middle of my third and final bereavement day for my grandmother. Day one was spent in NJ at the brief, but very nice funeral. After the luncheon, was shopping and the miserable eye appointment - still waiting for my new glasses. Not being allowed to wear contacts is just plain pissing me off. I am missing a nose piece and I fear I will have a permanent scar where the metal is scraping my nose. Yesterday I decluttered a bit - very therapeutic and cheaper than renting a dumpster and throwing out everything except the furniture and my toothbrush. I also found a funny as hell blog about a father raising 6 kids. I laughed out loud more times than I could count. So what did I learn by spending this much time at home?

1. Netflix through the Wii is freaking awesome. I can sit here and load my instant watch queue and it really is on instantly. We've been doing this for a while, but having this much time off at a time, it's been fun to run through the first 2 seasons of Waiting For God. Hilarious.

2. The secret to creating the best spreadable butter ever is to use less olive oil than butter. I also used regular olive oil because the extra virgin olive oil turns the spread green. And I'm sure you want to know why I make my own spreadable butter. It's not about cost. I just hate chemicals and the Country Crocks, etc are chock full of them. I don't use butter often, so I would like a quality product when I do indulge.

3. If I stayed home, I would eat junk food all the time. Yesterday I indulged in donuts and combos. I tried to drink Dunkin Donuts coffee, but stubborn me tried to carry all 5 bags from the car at the same time. Let's just say the kitchen floor is super clean now. I have recovered from the horrific food yesterday and my body appreciates the greens. At least tomorrow I have to plan out my food and only carry what I will eat.

4. Housework really doesn't take as much time as I think it does. It really only takes 2 minutes or less to unload the dishwasher. It took 10 minutes to clean out the fridge, including rinsing out the containers to be recycled. I am getting ready to vacuum the stairs and upstairs hallway on the way to take my 2nd dose of antibiotics. I'll be done in about 5-7 minutes. It's taken me all this time for Flylady's lessons to sink in.

5. I can't be home and not want to do laundry. Problem? There is no laundry to be done. I know - wtf?????

6. Cats are super lazy.

7. The iPod is the greatest invention in the world.

So those are some of my lessons learned this week.

I look like a monster

2010-06-08T09:33:00.002-04:00

And I feel like one, too! After my grandmother's funeral yesterday, I took Trinks shopping for little favors she can give to her cousins when we celebrate her birthday on vacation. She had a blast and we have a bunch of stuff waiting to be sorted and organized. Then it was time for my routine, long over due eye appointment. I thought it would the standard get new contacts visit. Um.... no.

I have an eye infection. Perhaps it's from wearing the 1 month disposable lens for a year. Jury's out, but perhaps that's the answer. Now I have to medicate my eyes hourly and dose them with antibiotics 4 times a day. If I am very good and proper, I can get fitted for new contacts on Friday. Sigh. I'm getting new glasses, too. I finally managed to figure out how to get insurance to pay for BOTH in the same year, and I am feeling rather proud of myself.

So if you find yourself on the roads in Delaware, look out! I am driving in my glasses and may not see you.

Itchy and Bitchy were in a boat

2010-06-05T14:14:00.004-04:00

No one fell out, who was left? Yes, both itchy AND bitchy reside in me today. The poison ivy has turned into a secondary infection called erythema multiforme (EM) again. While I can get the poison ivy under control, the EM is itching like I have never experienced. Coupled with the fact that the ceiling fan over our bed is broken and heat makes me itch more, the fun factor explodes. I woke up at 3:30, brought my pillows downstairs, exchanged a most likey inappropriately angry conversation with hubs, and threw the AC switch to stun. I slept on the pull out with a bag of frozen veggies cooling off my core temperature.

The kids woke up at 8:30 and were stunned to see me sleeping downstairs. I don't get sick very often, so they were concerned. Trinks offered to make me breakfast in bed and threw some bread in the toaster. While it cooked, she and S painted me a picture, made a card and created a song. Trinks' card made me cry - "Get Well SOON! I can see how much posin ivy did to you but secondary must hurt worst. We all hope you get well soon. We're sorry you are so ichy and it really sucks to stay in bed on weekends. We love you." How sweet is that? Then the toast popped up and S put sunflower butter and apricot jam on it. I just had to get up to make coffee.

So I am still in bed - researching causes, remedies, and anything else I can find. I took some generic zyrtec since it usually works for urticaria. When I am on my feet, it feels like I'm walking on burning marbles. I think that's the worst part - the lumps that form on the palms of the hands and feet. You can't itch those! I sent hubs with the kids to see a play in Philly and I loaded the instant queue in Netflix with movies and TV shows I want to watch. I watched Confessions of a Shopaholic, and am now catching up on Waiting for God - one of my all time favorite Brit Sits. It's a completely wasted day, but I can't summon the energy to do much.

S says the craziest things.....

2010-05-31T18:02:00.002-04:00

He was watching his cousin play with a hacky sack and mentioned he wanted his own "happy sack".

Trinks came down in a skort. S complained that she was wearing HIS skirt. It's the one he borrowed when they decided to belly dance. I love his open mind.

Poison Ivy update

2010-05-23T19:34:00.002-04:00

I've been doing really well with the poison ivy this time. Yes - it's annoying, it itches every once in a while, but I get relief for 95% of the time. This exposure was more than the last time and would normally put me in the hospital on steroids, prescription benadryl and generic zantac (histamine 2 blocker). That gave me relief for 40% of the time. The Hylands Poison Ivy/Poison Oak is amazingly effective. This time I added some Burdock, Quercetin and a ton of vitamin C. Next week I am going to experiment with Bentonite Clay. I now feel in control of my life and will no longer live in fear of getting poisoned. I managed to rip out the remaining poison ivy from the flower beds. All that remains is the stuff behind the shed. I plan to just poison the stuff and leave it alone. Just need to mix up a big batch of "earth begone" and the soil will be sterile forever.

S graduated

2010-05-23T15:12:00.004-04:00

And then made a wish...

That his teeth would be yellow.

Mythbusters - Posey's poison ivy edition

2010-05-20T21:42:00.002-04:00

So I have poison ivy again. It's on my hands, it's all over my arms, it's all over my legs, it's on my back and neck. Normally I would freak, but I know I can get relief from the homeopathic stuff. In order to have a little fun, I decided to try Burdock Root as my cure. If I don't get relief by Saturday, I will go to the rhus tox. Can't hurt to know another cure and I might as well make the best of it. I plan to hit the ground running this weekend to get more of it out. I might as well be completely miserable and never have to worry about the poison ivy in the yard again.

Pictures from the food allergy walk

2010-05-16T21:29:00.005-04:00

There were educational signs all over the place.

I asked S to get a hat. He decided this was just as good.

Notice the shoes S chose, AND NO ONE NOTICED UNTIL WE WERE ALMOST READY TO WALK. And his sister tied them for him. Not only are they the same foot, but the one on the left is TRINKS' shoe.

When in Brazil, don't eat the nuts

2010-05-15T18:54:00.004-04:00

Yesterday Hubs and I took the kids to the allergist in Philly. It was a pretty good visit. S got further nut testing, resulting in discovering a Brazil nut allergy. We opted not to get tested for peanut allergies. Since he eats peanut butter with no reaction, he should be fine. There is a 40% chance of a false positive with the test, so I'd rather just watch for symptoms. We have an epi pen, so I'm not too worried. He has grown 3 inches and gained enough weight to be too big for the epi-pen junior. For school's sake, he's allergic to all nuts. Cross contamination is a huge risk, so if he goes for an almond that brushed up against a cashew, pistachio, or a Brazil nut, he'll have a reaction. School is allegedly a nut free zone, but I don't believe it. Parents don't understand that one simple food can simply kill another child.

Trinks needed no further allergy testing and can come off her daily asthma meds. I don't like daily meds for her type of asthma and I've been itching to discontinue it. If it was me, I would have simply stopped, but I tend to require doctor's supervision before I act medically for my kids. We have a new asthma plan, and it's similar to mine. Phew!

So today we walked for food allergy awareness. I was happy to see lots of educational materials and samples. I picked up the new epi pen tester and some epi-pen paraphernalia. I picked up 2 dvds about epi-pens (one's for you, NJ teacher)and a pamphlet about knowing the risks. I signed up for a meeting at the local library for food allergy support. I skipped the samples of soy butter because I currently believe that soy in the processed form is evil (that is another blog post and watch Food Inc. to see why the soy seed company is very very evil). I did snag some free samples of the sunflower butter. I used to buy this and forgot all about it. I didn't tell S what it was and he really liked it. Trinks loved it as well, so I can keep some on hand.

SO I've learned it's all about knowing what goes into the food you eat. And I'm learning to act on what I really do know - processed food is really bad, whether you have allergies or not. If I can't pronounce the ingredients, or if they go on over an inch, I don't want to eat it. Chemicals aren't food.

So not a cake wreck

2010-05-13T19:35:00.002-04:00

This was the coolest baby shower cake I have ever seen. Not sure what to call everyone, so post to take credit. It was also delicious.

THAT'S why the bed is too small

2010-05-11T22:18:00.004-04:00

S complains ALL THE TIME about how he has the smallest bed in the house. Imagine what he could build in a bigger bed.

New glasses

2010-05-04T21:58:00.004-04:00

The day finally came. I expected this last year, but Trinks has really taken care of her glasses, at least in the sense that they are in one piece. Dirty and scratched? absolutely. They broke this weekend and were held together with duct tape until today when the tape gave way. I was out so hubs took both kids to the mall to get a new pair of glasses. Turns out insurance sucks and they won't pay for glasses this year. Ugh. So on that note, we cancelled her eye appointment in June. I'll take that appointment and take S for his first appointment.

Thursdays with Grandma

2010-05-03T22:08:00.004-04:00

After college, I found myself at loose ends.I moved back home and started working at my high school job and started taking graduate classes. I worked weekends, but I had Thursdays off. Thursdays turned into Grandma days. Some days we would go to Turkey Swamp Park with a picnic. Other times we would drive to the beach and walk on the boardwalk. Still other times were plain and boring - I would drive Grandma's car, fill it up with gas and go to the farmer's market. We would go out for a nice lunch and talk and talk and talk. I love hanging out with her and hearing her stories. She was always interested in what I was doing, and never, ever asked when I was getting a real job Thursdays were a lot of fun.

My grandmother died today. She was 93 and had suffered with Alzheimers for years. The first time she didn't know who I was devastated me. I don't think I stopped crying for a week. Just about a week ago, I went to visit her the day before her birthday. She slept through the last several visits I had with her, so I didn't hope for much. I arrived as she was out for some sun on the beautiful spring afternoon. She knew who I was! She proved that when I tried to convince her I was her favorite grandchild. She looked me in the eye and glared the Grandma glare at me. She told me twice that she loved me, and we watched the birds and spring flowers together. She held my hand and kept telling me she couldn't talk much. For an hour, I had my Grandma back. It was such a wonderful gift.

I will miss my grandmother. She was a steady influence in my childhood. I can't remember a time when I didn't see her at least every week. She could bake bread better than anyone I ever met. Her muffins were legendary. She would walk to the market almost daily to get dinner. On special occasions, she would walk us to Jamesway to eat in their restaurant. She was stubborn. She was smart. She was an army nurse who took crap from no one. I loved her dearly and can't really believe she's gone.

Trinks and S go to DC

2010-04-25T15:43:00.010-04:00

We decided to take the kids to see the sights in DC. Trinks was there for a march when she was two, but hadn't been back for sight seeing. It was time to explore was now. We left home around 8:30 and got back at 10:30 - what a long day. We didn't' try to do too much - just get a quick tour of the most famous memorials and some museums. The kids were pretty enthusiastic, even in a drizzling rain. We ended up walking 8.25 miles with just a little whining. A Spongebob Popsicle eliminated the complaining. S desperately wanted to knock on the door at the White House to say hi to the president. He seemed confused that the president may be too busy to see us. He loves President Obama and would love to meet him.

Here are some of the highlights of the trip. And yes - Michelle Obama's dress, and the Hope Diamond. I'm sure you'll notice that that I let the kids pick Lincoln's nose. I'm sure Lincoln would understand kids' humor.

Scalded boobs, poison ivy and pink eye, oh my!

2010-04-20T21:24:00.004-04:00

Just about two weeks ago I accidentally dumped scalding hot water down the front of me and ended up with two 2 inch 2nd degree burns on my boobs. Lovely! I knew it was pretty bad when hubs wouldn't even joke about the injury and he kept looking at me sympathetically. The burns are pretty deep and ugly, but I seem to be on the mend. Two days after that, I worked in the garden and got my traditional April poison ivy outbreak. This time was different.

Once I realized I was exposed, I took a cold shower to close my pores so the poison couldn't get in as much. Then I scrubbed my arms with oil of oregano. I have very small patches of blisters. I followed up with a trip to the co-op to get Rhus Tox. This is a homeopathic remedy made from poison ivy and dries the blisters up rather quickly. I didn't need steroids this year and I'm sure my liver thanks me. I plan to slowly kill the vines so I can have an outdoor life again.

So yes, the last two weeks have been rather a humorous comedy of errors. I continued the fun this morning. Yup - my left eye was sealed shut and bright red. If I wasn't such a moron, I would have kept my contacts OUT today. Lesson learned - I will do that tomorrow. So I think I've had enough fun for a while.

kind of a sad day

2010-03-31T23:03:00.002-04:00

Today Karen would have been 38. All I could think about today is what she would be like today - two beautiful girls, a great husband, two deranged cats and a big dog. The American dream. Yelling for the girls to settle down while she's on the phone. Making me stay on the phone while she investigated a strange noise. Complaining her husband worked too many hours in the same breath as mentioning how many work people think he's awesome. All this while talking a mile a minute and barely pausing to breathe.

I think her birthday hurts more than the anniversary of her death. Birthdays are about potential and looking forward to what lies ahead in the next year. Yes, they get less exciting as we get older. For me it's always been an annual evaluation of where I want to be in the next year, 5 years, etc. But for Karen, it will always be a reflection on what could have been and isn't. The death of a dream is just as real as a death of a person.

Yes, this is a kind of depressing reflection. Today has just been that kind of day. Here's hoping for a good April Fools Day tomorrow.

Killing me softly with paint fumes, killing me softly

2010-03-27T21:01:00.002-04:00

In December I became ill at work. My co-worker had to file an incident report and see a doctor. We became sickened by the stench of window paint primer. The guys finally finished our area and we got better. No more headaches, nausea or neuropathy. Fast forward to last week. I moved buildings. The new building hadn't been through the primer process. They started on our floor and we got sick again. This time, I didn't hesitate. I e-mailed the nurse and let her know we were getting sick and asked what the company would do to protect us. Then I asked for the primer ingredients. Now I want a lawyer.

The health warning on the primer label indicates that anyone with a history of respiratory illness should not be exposed to the fumes. I have asthma. Hell - this is Delaware. We ALL have asthma. No note went out advising that those of us with lung problems should stay home until they finish poisoning us. Not extra fresh air was piped in to push the poison out of the air. I am beyond pissed off at this point. I do feel badly for the workers because now they have to work weekends until the company can relocate us temporarily. I sent an e-mail (I don't expect it to be answered) asking why I was deliberately exposed to a chemical that could impact my future health. Next week should be even more fun.

If you don't know the words to the hymn, sing louder

2010-03-11T21:37:00.003-05:00

Today I was in a beautiful church with a very talented choir. We were there for a funeral for a family friend who died on Sunday. He fought leukemia for three years and died from viral pneumonia. The services were wonderful and the eulogy was awesome. The songs were great and the choir was phenomenal. The lady behind us decided she knew several of the words, so she could sing too. She was loud, off key and stumbled over a few hymns. Every time she didn't know the words, she hummed or made up the words very loudly. I'm sure I will go to hell, but it was pretty funny. I also told my mother "May the force be with you" when we were sharing the peace. At least I think it's called that. Although my mother was amused, I'm sure that's another thing I am going to hell for.

Today I also realized yet again how strong the ties are to my old neighborhood. I haven't lived there since I was 5, but our neighbors were a tightknit group who still get together all these years later. No one lives on Stilwell Place anymore. We kids ran around the neighborhood in a pack and rarely got in bad trouble. Not sure if my parents knew about the ding dong ditch we would play when we slept over at Carrie's house, but all the pranks were harmless. All the kids came home for the viewings and funeral. While it was incredibly sad, it was nice to see everyone. My parents are keeping the family fed and more importantly, supplying wine.

Recent Pictures

2010-03-10T22:04:00.009-05:00

I haven't downloaded pictures in forever, so these should cover the last couple of weeks. Work has stressed me out more than I've ever been in my life, plus we're moving to a new building. Schlepping everyone around for belt testing was not really that fun for me. But we did manage to have a bunch of fun. Here are the highlights. And yes, my son stuffed his t-shirt with his snuggie and fell asleep. Topping off the evening, he woke up to pee and PEED ON MY SOCKS. Two weeks ago it was the bath mat. Why the heck can't he turn on the light????

Happy MS Awareness week

2010-03-08T07:10:00.002-05:00

I will be the first to say I don't understand MS. I just don't get how healthy people can wake up one day with tingling, eye problems, walking problems, and worse. I don't understand why every case of MS is different. I think the only thing I understand is we need to find a cure and restore MS sufferers to health.

Ivy has done an excellent job with educating me about the condition and I read her blog faithfully. I am anxiously waiting to see when she gets the call to be able to go through an experimental test. I think the test and perhaps subsequent treatment will help her.

This is MS Awareness week and I will now focus my attention on the MS walk in OC in May. The only thing I know is I can walk, so I better get walking for a good cause.

I own my car

2010-03-06T15:43:00.001-05:00

I just clicked the submit button to pay off my car three years early!! Can't wait to drive it tomorrow to see how it runs! So very excited!!!!!

My blender is here

2010-03-02T21:54:00.002-05:00

Poor Waring blender of no more than 240 volts. It was a faithful little blender for about 14 years. I am now the owner of a 2 horsepower Vita Mix. It can VAPORIZE fruits and veggies in SECONDS. I feel like Tim on Tool Time - so very powerful. S was even more excited that it arrived. He impatiently interrupted Trinks to let her know the blender was waiting for us at home. Trinks doesn't like green smoothies, so she really didn't care.

After I dropped Trinks off at Brownies, I raced in the door, opened the box and got the veggies out of the fridge. I threw in kale, spinach, spiralina, frozen strawberries, orange juice, aloe vera juice, a carrot, a banana, and flax seeds. Delish! It took longer to get the stuff out than it did to blend it smooth. S demanded seconds - strange little boy. It was amazing! I am thrilled out of my mind.

Catching up

2010-02-21T07:48:00.002-05:00

This has been a great weekend to catch up on things. Friday night S headed over to Parents Night Out and Trinks worked a cookie booth. I ran them around, met up with hubs and ordered Chinese food for a quiet night in. Trinks decided she wanted to stay with the booth and never made it to PNO. Hubs and I enjoyed a nice evening of watching Olympics with no whining.

The kids left for Bubbe's house Saturday morning. Hubs and I went to the farmer's market and then hit Home Depot. I finally have a light in my room! S broke the light several months ago and we never seemed to have time to replace it. Our door handle to the front door is just about broken, so we'll replace that today. I hate the dryer vent tube, so we got another that will be easier to clean.

I think the best thing I did was clean out the silverware drawer. I don't think I've done that since we moved in. Hubs tends to leave the drawer open, so crumbs from the counter drop in. It was so dirty I had to vacuum the drawer. In the pile of crumbs was a pill he used to take when he was battling Ulcerative Colitis. It made me pause. For years, we couldn't plan anything without worrying about how he would feel. He would be fine for a while and then it would flare up again. Hubs was reluctant to share how he was feeling, so I never knew if it was back again. The last flare up lasted just under a year before his surgery cured him forever. He has been cured for over 5 years, and it still humbles me. We are free! I never worry about anything as we plan a vacation. I don't have to worry that he's not going to tell me if he's sick - we had a massive fight years ago that got rid of that. Plus the worst that happens these days is he gets a cold. It made me realize how truly blessed we are. Ahhhh - what a great weekend!!

Bethany day 2

2010-02-16T21:29:00.016-05:00

After breakfast, we hit the beach. We drove down to the main square, scored a close parking spot and started towards the beach. Most of the boardwalk was an icy mess, but someone shoveled a path to the beach. We dropped all the beach toys except the shell pail. Then we started shelling. One thing I miss about where I live is how far we are from the beach. I LOVE the beach. Growing up, we were about a half hour from Manasquan and would spend a lot of summer days on the beach. We would leave the house early and by 7:30, we were on the beach. By 2 or 3, we were done and would go to Grandmom’s house to be hosed off enough to go swimming. Some nights we would pick up subs and eat on the beach. On weekends, we would drive a little farther and hit Island Beach State Park. We rarely, if ever, went to the main beach. Instead, we went to the unsupervised beaches with no flush toilets. And then in the winter, we would occasionally go to the beach. As I got older, beach badges got really expensive and we traveled more. I spent more time on beaches in Florida, Tortola, the Bahamas. So today was very nostalgic.

When I was around 11 or 12, my sister and I got a blistering sunburn - my first ever. I had blisters on my face, and pain over the rest of me. Unfortunately, it was only one of the first days. So we came up with a plan for the rest of the vacation. We would go swimming, shelling and anything out in the sun until 11. Then we would sort our shells, clean them and identify them under the shade of the picnic table canopy. I learned a lot about different shells, and we collected a lot of interesting shells and sharks teeth that week. Today, I had my NJ beach shell expectations - mussels, oysters, clam, quahog, and an occasional snail shell. Imagine my surprise when I found whole welks, lady slippers, and THREE SAND DOLLARS!! I never thought the sand dollars came this far north, but the weather has been strange, so the choppy water might have dragged in some unusual shells. After strolling down the beach, we stopped to play in the sand and snow. The kids still insisted on gathering water to make wet sand castles. We made a snowman and ran around like lunatics.

We came back to warm up before searching for lunch. Hubs wanted fajitas. When he wants a certain food, nothing else will substitute. It was amusing that we got all the way to Ocean City to find out the only open Mexican restaurant didn’t open until 5. So we set off to grab a hoagie at Wawa and tracked down Asseneteague State Park. I will pause for the inevitable “Mommy said ASS”. Assenteague is where the wild ponies live. It was an incredible experience to pull into the parking lot to find three wild ponies eating grass. There were some idiots who were feeding and petting the ponies, and yes, I was hoping they would get bitten!! I think it’s amazing that there is a place for us to observe wild animals, but people who feed animals teach the animals that humans will feed them and they will lose their natural ability to find food when the humans go home. Ok - off the soap box. We headed to the beach, but we were intimidated by the electric fence on the dunes and the four foot drop off. We observed the beach and then headed back to drive through the park to find more ponies. Two miles into the drive, we hit the National Park. We turned around because $15 was a bit steep for the privilege of driving through. If we were staying all day or at least going to get out of the car, we would have gladly paid. Instead, we returned to the really awesome visitor’s center. Trinks and I are going to get the Misty of Chiconteague books out of the library this week. We’ll be prepared for our next trip down this way.

We tried to go to the Assawoman Wildlife preserve. Unfortunately one of the roads was closed, and it was getting late. We trekked back to Ocean City, hit the Candy kitchen (yes - there is one every 2 blocks or so), and made it to the Mexican restaurant just after they opened for dinner. Trinks and I had burritos, S had chicken tenders and potato chips (but ate a ton of salsa and chips) and hubs got his fajitas.

No caption necessary

2010-02-16T07:20:00.002-05:00

Bethany Beach adventure part 1

2010-02-15T17:38:00.012-05:00

We didn't have wifi access at the timeshare because we were too lazy to set it up. It was a nice break. I did have my laptop with me, so I was able to document our trip.

After hitting the Dunkin Donuts for donuts and bagels (to last the whole weekend) and grocery store for supplies and Duraflame logs, we took off for slower, lower Delaware. My goal for the weekend was simple: find a Sonic. Dawn from Because I Said So raves about Sonic, their commercials are pretty funny, and cherry limeade sounds really awesome. As we hit Dover, the exit sign proudly proclaimed there was a Sonic .7 miles off the exit. We pulled in, ordered corn dogs, bubble gum slushes, and tator tots for the kids, bacon cheeseburgers with tator tots for hubs and me. I had the cherry limeade, but hubs was really boring and went for a Barqs. It was amazing! So glad the closest one to us is an hour away.

We arrived in Bethany with a squirming son who was managing to hold it in for 20 minutes when we discovered the timeshare was not where we expected it to be. Hmmmm…. what to do?? Call mom! She looked up better directions (GPS has maps from 2007 - guess this place wasn’t around then). We arrived, punched a code into the lockbox and bam! We were in! We had no expectations for this place - it was a last minute idea and we took what we could get within 2-3 hour drive from our house. So when we walked into an small entryway that looked over a patio with a grill, it was nice. We climbed the stairs to the 2nd floor to find the kitchen, dining room, living room (with fireplace), and half bathroom. The next set of stairs led to the two bedrooms and full bath. And then there was another set of stairs leading to a loft (kind of weird to have a common area that overlooks the master bedroom), another bathroom and a sauna. Yes - a sauna. Pretty cool, huh?

So we dropped our stuff, put things away, and headed out to explore. We ended up in Ocean City MD. It’s a pretty impressive city! There are HUGE hotels lining the ocean and tons of cheesy beach stores. We could have eaten in a number of seafood restaurants, but decided to return to Bethany to eat at the Cottage Café. We had a coupon for 15% off the early bird menu - are we getting old or what??? The place was packed! Trinks had fried shrimp, S had mac and cheese, hubs had fried oysters, and I had a broiled portabella stuffed with spinach, topped by a crab cake, topped by imperial sauce. Amazing!!! While we were waiting to be served, Trinks whipped out trivia cards that she made. She created several questions to test our knowledge of…. Her. It was well done and we had fun answering some interesting questions, all the while praying we got the answers right. I think we passed.

We returned back to the timeshare for a donut and hot chocolate (kids) and rum drinks for us. We lit a fire and were cozy for approximately 2 hours - darn thing was supposed to last 3.5 hours. We played Zingo, did a puzzle, and watched the Olympics. It’s nice to relax and not have to be in our house!

I want to go to work!!!

2010-02-11T20:31:00.002-05:00

I am so sick of being in the house, that I am going to work on a scheduled day off. The good news is we have huge tubs of stuff to give away. Just this afternoon I went through 5 drawers and gave away/threw away a ton of crap. Trinks has two tubs of crap ready to go to Goodwill. Any more time in the house will result in EVERYTHING going. I think we are on target to get rid of half our things this year.

So tomorrow, S goes back to school and Trinks goes to kung fu camp. She was already scheduled to be off tomorrow, so it's not a big deal. I'm hoping for a quiet day so I can resolve tons of things before enjoying another long stretch at home. As of right now, the place we were planning to go to this weekend has no power and is still in a state of emergency. We'll at least go out for a few meals so we can feel like we went away.

candle lit dinner with wine

2010-02-11T02:47:00.002-05:00

Doesn't it sound romantic? It wasn't really, but the kids put on a great show, dancing in the candle light. We lost power just after 10:30 AM. I only had ONE cup of coffee! Usually the power comes back up in an hour or less, so we picked up books, took naps, wrestled each other. Three hours later we realized it wasn't coming back soon and called the power company. There were several explosions, several flashes of light, but no power was restored.

I was impressed that the kids took all this in stride and kept themselves occupied. S found his DS, Trinks read, drew pictures and danced. We hung out, told stories and had fun. Hubs was cranky, but I don't think he completely hated the day. We lit the menorah for light and a little fun and called the grandparents to wish them a happy Hannukkah. We had turkey and cheese sandwiches for lunch and dinner since we couldn't cook. The kids went to bed together to keep warm, although the temperature in the house didn't get below 50. S wouldn't even keep his sweatshirt on because he was warm. As an interesting change, hubs was freezing and I was very warm. He even put on sweatpants over his shorts - amazing.

We went to bed early, so we can't pinpoint when the power officially came back on, but it looks like it was 11PM. We survived 12 hours without power. Thank goodness it wasn't summer or we would have lost everything in the fridge and freezer. I think I've used up most of my candles from all the candle parties I used to go to. The house smells like vanilla and cranberry - yum.

So now that I have confirmed the kids have no place to go, and we are still covered by the state of emergency, I can go back to bed. YAWN! A day of doing nothing really makes me sleepy.

I should never be allowed to stay home

2010-02-08T16:59:00.003-05:00

Since I was home today, I figured I couldn't get into trouble. Trinks and I had a lovely day. We watched Kit Kittridge, went sledding, had a nice lunch, took a nice long bath in the soaking tub (Trinks, not me), and just plain enjoyed the day. Then there was a knock on the door. I usually ignore it, but Trinks went to the window and shouted, "There's a man at the door, Mommy!" Crap - can't ignore him now.

It turns out to be the local Fios dude. I wanted Fios in the worst way last year when we were having horrific problems with the Verizon's DSL. No one could tell us when Fios was coming, so we went to Comcast. Two months later they dug up the development for Fios. I hate change and time off for installations, so I never pursued Fios. Then I have a guy on my icy front step selling me Fios. Since I could always cancel the installation, I signed up. It will save us about $10 a month for the first year. I'm still in uber frugal mode, so I can appreciate the $120 in my pocket. If I can't cancel cable all together, then saving money on it is pretty good. I'll get the old desk top hardwired for Fios and the wifi will take care of the laptop. Then I can get Magic Jack and save $15/month. When hubs gets home tonight, we'll talk about it.

Right now both kids are home. Trinks didn't want to come with me to pick S up, so she stayed home alone for 20 minutes. She was so excited. S is mad that he has to go to school tomorrow and Trinks doesn't. I hope the kung fu studio opens for camp tomorrow, but both school districts they service are closed tomorrow. Heck - even Brownies is cancelled. Our development roads are pure crap, so I understand. It just pisses me off that no one plowed, but the walking path at the park is clear. WTF???

The times they are a changing!

2010-02-08T10:01:00.002-05:00

So here I am with an unexpected day off because of the snow. Trinks has no school - SHOCKING! We don't expect her to go to school this week, since it was a short week to begin with and we are expecting another foot of snow on Wednesday. Hubs was supposed to take off today, but his coworker's house caught on fire and she's home with the insurance adjusters. Normally I would have sympathy for her, but she is a crap magnet hypochondraic and has made things difficult for hubs by her overuse of days off that she just doesn't have. So poor hubs went off to work after expecting to take it easy and I ended up taking today. We'll go sledding after we finish watching Kit Kittredge.

But the point of this post is I am anxiously awaiting news from NJ Mets fan and wife. Baby #3 is on the way, probably already here, and I am checking Facebook religiously. When Trinks was born, we didn't even have a cell phone. We borrowed our parents' phones to alert the masses. When S was born, we had a cell phone, but downloading pictures and posting them to the internet seemed like such a hassle. This is a much better time to have a baby, technologically speaking.

What I like most about this baby is the gender is unknown. In this day and age, it's almost unheard of to keep it a mystery. It just makes the arrival so much more exciting this way. I already put my bet in that it's a 10 pound, 25.5 inch boy. I am just about 100% wrong with all of my guesses, so it's probably going to be a 6 pound, 19 inch baby girl. Come on NJ Mets Fan - post already!!! With a picture!!! And a name!!!

Ask, and you shall receive

2010-02-07T00:02:00.004-05:00

A couple of weeks ago, our toaster oven died. It just stopped toasting. I could broil toast, but my favorite method of cooking in it is the toast function. Chicken nuggets take 2 cycles, pierogies take 3. We don't use it often, but it's a comforting little appliance. I was complaining about it at work and my co-worker looked at me and mentioned that he was getting rid of his. He mentioned it is slow to toast and it's big. He brought it in the next day and I set it up today. It's HUGE! And it WORKS!

I like when things work out. I needed a new toaster, he needed to get rid of the almost knew oven his wife didn't like anymore. Now let me see if anyone is getting rid of a barely used, $200 surf rod.....

Feeling human again

2010-02-02T21:26:00.004-05:00

Day 2 - face is less puffy, I'm not cranky and random strange aches aren't as sore. Ahhhhh - relief. I haven't completely eliminated gluten. I just have it at night and it puts me to sleep.

I did have a blast playing with this today. I am a huge fan of reflexology. It's free when you do it to yourself and I find it relieves a lot of minor issues. Maybe it just distracts you from you pain, but I can usually get rid of a headache by pushing a pressure point. Don't forget the click on the foot map. You can imagine you have rare diseases based on where you feel pain. But before you panic, recheck the map. It's really your spine, not your pancreas.

GF, here I come

2010-01-31T21:33:00.002-05:00

I have been off the health wagon since my extensive travels in November. I feel like crap. My face is puffy, my head is foggy, and I have random, annoying aches all over my body. I am cranky, and after I eat wheat, I am exhausted. This week I started with the f-ing urticaria again. I'm tired of itching. My heavy work season is over, so I am going gluten free again. And in true Posey style, it will be M-F, with some compliance on weekends. I can't go cold turkey. It's easier to do things healthy during the week because I pack my breakfast and lunch. Green smoothies will have to be a rare treat as my blender is just about dead. Hubs is not thrilled with my idea to get a vita mix, so it will have to wait until I pay off the car in March.

So what's up for this week? Last night I made quinoa with garlic, spinach and diced tomatoes. Tonight I made millet with raisins, apricots, and coconut. I broke it into some small bowls, and I have lunch for the week. I have a boatload of fruit to snack on, and I planned to have any gluten at night, so I can take advantage of how tired it makes me. I plan to roll out a plan for the kids next week. S is randomly breaking out and Trinks is having a hard time focusing on bringing her homework home. The allergist refuses to return my call, so I'll work on the the kids diet. It's free and healthy, so why not?

Trinks already has a dating standard

2010-01-28T21:20:00.002-05:00

And she has some pretty high standards! This is the list of qualities she is looking for when she is in high school. She hates all the boys in her school, including the three who like her.

1. - doesn't drink.
2. - no bad grades
3. - must be smart
4. - must exercise
5. - cannot be weak
6. - must appreciate her interests, which are kung fu and Girl Scouts

Renewing our vows - 500th blog post

2010-01-25T22:32:00.004-05:00

The other night I asked hubs if he would renew our vows. He reluctantly agreed. With a big smile, I showed him the cake I wanted.

Yup - the only reason I would get married again would be for this kick ass cake, posted on Cake Wrecks. Needless to say, we are not renewing our vows. We will continue to be in awe every additional year we make it work.

Good bye S, hello Trinks

2010-01-23T21:18:00.006-05:00

We waved good bye to S this AM. He's headed down to FL for his last January trip to FL for a long time. Just spoke with him and they are in GA and will find a place to sleep soon. The three of us coped as best we could with the sudden silence.

Trinks and I hit her room with a vengeance. We got rid of more clothes, found a cover up that will fit her this summer, and threw out a bunch of crap. It's getting easier. The space is getting clearer and Trinks is doing much better. We don't have to sell her on the black market. I think she may be allowed to have her holiday gifts by Valentine's Day. So far, I am on track to get rid of half our crap this year. Next room - mine! So much crap to donate, so little time.

But it wasn't all work today. Trinks mentioned she wanted to see the Spy Next Door. We went. Hubs and I expected it to be horrible, but we both really liked it. It reminded me a lot of Uncle Buck. Then Trinks mentioned she wanted rotisserie turkey, so we went grocery shopping. Hubs made mashed potatoes while Trinks and I decluttered some more. Now Trinks and I are watching Suze Orman before I send her off to bed soon. She wants to walk the 3 mile loop at the park tomorrow, so we'll see what the weather looks like tomorrow.

We always enjoy having the kids one at a time. It really gives us a chance to see what crazy little people they are turning into. This will be a week of seafood and more interesting dinners. I will play some Super Mario Brothers without a crazed 5 year old telling me what to do every second. I am a bit sick of his Yoshi eating ME!

So this should be a good week. We'll miss S and his constant stream of comedy, but he'll be back in no time. Then it will be Trinks' turn to go away in April. I hope the kids realize how blessed they are!

I need more sleep

2010-01-20T21:01:00.005-05:00

First indication I need more sleep is how I overreacted (SHOCKING) to Trinks' MAP scores. Keep in mind, I didn't freak over her actual scores. I was just beyond confused as to what the hell they mean. It was a page of raw data with minimal explanation. I jotted a long note to the teacher explaining I had no idea what it meant, and the - here's the complete overreaction - I SENT A NOTE TO THE COMPANY WHO CREATED THE DAMN TEST AND ASKED THEM TO DECODE THE RESULTS. I consider myself to be reasonably intelligent, but this stuff from NWEA makes no sense. After a call from the reading teacher and a detailed e-mail from tech support (both think I am a complete idiot, I'm sure), I am sure of only one thing. These tests are complete and utter bullshit. Trinks did really well, especially in math, but I don't know what to do with the scores.

The ONLY nice thing I will say about this test is it gave a lexile range. Yup - took the teacher explaining this 3 times before I realized it was a fancy name for READING LEVEL. Don't care about the level, but this website will give you book suggestions for the number you type in. Pretty cool. There are over 1,000 books in the 659-700 range. Finally, a tool I understand.

Catching up

2010-01-17T20:41:00.011-05:00

I've been putting in a lot of hours at work for my busy season. I will be FREE after 1/26. Can't wait! I took an unprecedented step and took TWO DAYS OFF IN A ROW! I am refreshed. And ready to work tomorrow on the holiday. At least I will get another day off for this time. So here's what's been going on at Posey's house.

PNO Friday- Parent's night out at kung fu was arcade night. S was in his glory. I got home around 7:30 and took over cooking duties. Hubs is a freaking perfectionist and he lectured me about how to make beef tacos (I mean really - it's beef tacos!!) until I threatened to make him cook. I was pretty much asleep when they returned at 11.

Clean up Saturday. After watching Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat (yes even hubs watched it and didn't hate it), we played a little Super Mario Brothers and then split up to clean and run errands. Trinks and I challenged each other to complete tasks on our lists and then joined forces in her room to clean out under her bed. We threw out an entire black trash bag of crap and have a box of summer clothes to send to Haiti. Even after donating about 10 pair of shorts and 25 shirts, we still have 20 pair of shorts, 15 of which will definitely fit her next year, and 30 summer T-shirts. We need NOTHING for summer. I will buy her a cover up and sport sandals, but that is ALL she needs. I am sending 6 pair of jeans to Ivy, but we have about 5 more pair. It feels good to get our overabundance out of the house and allow others to use it since we cannot. Trinks room looks great, but we have a ways to go. Baby steps!

Sunday is fun day! We started out with some Mario Brothers, then headed out to the bowling alley. I bowl WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY better on Wii, but it is fun to bowl in real lief (with bumpers) every once in a while. I broke 100 both games, and beat hubs on the second game. Then Trinks and I headed over to hibachi to dine with the Girl Scouts to kick off the cookie season!

Tonight I pulled the kids into food prep. It made hubs nervous watching S cut the asparagus, but S was pretty good with our sharpest knife. I LOVE his outfit. Trinks wanted garlic sauteed spinach, so she got to cook it. I did the chicken and rice. Dinner is way more fun to cook with helpers.

My son's wedding cake

2010-01-12T21:00:00.005-05:00

Now all we need is the bride. If you haven't wandered over to Cake Wrecks, why the heck not???

Tackle body, tackle body, tackle body

2010-01-05T07:09:00.003-05:00

We are back in the swing of things. School is back in session, kung fu reopened, and Monday night is library night. S and I hit the library and he wanted Kidz Bop 80s. Fine. We got the rest of our books and headed out to get gas and pick Trinks up. S was amazed I knew all the songs on the cd, then banned me from singing because it was annoying. Grrr. Once Trinks got in the car, S excitedly told her he was listening to Tackle body. When I could breathe again, I let him know it was Funkytown (talk about it, talk about it, talk about it)

My men

2010-01-03T22:07:00.004-05:00

The house was a little too quiet...

2010-01-03T21:58:00.004-05:00

Hubs was under the weather today so I took the kids to the grocery store. Without hubs' eagle eye on the budget, I strayed slightly. I did buy all organic meats and organic milk, but only came up $8 over what we normally spend. The afternoon was quiet. The kids disappeared while I made my lunches and breakfast for the week. I just downloaded the Longwood Gardens pictures and found the below images, plus others.

Christmas

2009-12-27T08:39:00.006-05:00

I need Christmas to be on a Friday every year. I mean if it really is Christ's birth we are celebrating, it should be in August, but that's besides the point. I just want a long weekend. It was nice to be able to relax and talk to family instead of rushing out the door to make sure we get to work the next day.

But I think Elmo and Patsy summed up the holiday best - "it's not Christmas without Grandma." We suffered three big losses this year - Grandmom, Aunt Charlotte, and my cousin's grandmother. These three ladies we very special and the loss is a gaping hole in our families. We remembered them with stories, songs, laughter and tears.

I think the funniest thing was the talent show that my sister coordinated. M-cat played his broken trumpet and wowed us with his magician skills, the Divine Ms Em paired up with Trinks for dancing and singing, S stepped out of his shyness to leave us rolling on the floor with his dance styling - the robot with break dancing. I quoted Ananbel Lee, my father - the Jabberwakky and my sister did The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere. Then my mom and sisters recreated their Grange acts - the Chipmunks's Christmas song (Pop Pop was Dave), Oh you beautiful Doll, Sugar in the morning, before my mom cracked open her accordian. My grandfather surprised us with a short poem about a billy goat. It was good fun.

I spent yesterday downloading several thousand pictures for my mother. I also set up her iPod to play in the car. Her car is really old, so I bought her an adapter to go in the cigarette lighter LAST YEAR for Christmas. But at least it works now. Mom wanted S to stay for her birthday on Monday, and she threw in a ride ALL the way to DE, so hubs and I are alone. I already sorted through S' toys and have a big bag to go to Goodwill. Trinks' room is a week long project since we don't her back until Wednesday. I can't walk into the room again, so this time I am not trying to work things out with her. Things are just disappearing. Her holiday presents will be held hostage until I see progress. Her clothes are also going. I cut her down to 5 pair of jeans. Apparently that was too many, so she now has 2. I have to find the magic number where she actually takes care of something. By the end of January, the kids rooms will have possessions reduced by 1/2, so then I can move on to the next room. If I focus on a room a month, I can meet my goal of getting rid of 1/2 of everything we have. You can't organize clutter, it all has to go.

Santa arrived!

2009-12-25T10:18:00.005-05:00

My street, 5 days after it stopped snowing

2009-12-25T10:09:00.004-05:00

It's sad when our driveway is cleaner than the street.

No wonder there was no school.

Mommy - guess what???

2009-12-24T23:36:00.002-05:00

I peed in a cup.

Why would S pee in a cup? And why would he announce it at Christmas Eve dinner? Apparently Trinks was taking a milisecond too long to pee, and the cup dispenser was so handy. And he managed to fill the Dixie cup, dump it, and fill it again. My first thought was, if the toilet was free to dump the first cup, why couldn't he have finished peeing in the toilet? I guess it was too much fun. He seemed especially proud of himself.

Anniversary

2009-12-21T21:41:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow is the second anniversary of the day I never thought would happen. I still can't believe Karen has been gone for two years. I've finally stopped dialing her number halfway through just to remember she won't be there. I still hear her laugh and sometimes I see her everywhere I go. I especially miss her around Christmas. I miss taking Christmas Eve off to meet her for breakfast with the kids. I miss running around doing useless last minute shopping because we have nothing better to do. It still takes my breath away at how quickly we lost her. And then I see her girls and it hurts even more. More than anything else, Karen wanted to be a mother. She suffered through miscarriages until she got her girls. And then she couldn't stay to raise them. I am still not over the unfairness of it all. So tomorrow while I will be sad and cranky, I will try to do something to honor the memory of a truly great friend.

Gonna hold who needs holdin'
Mend what needs mendin'
Walk what needs walkin'
Though it means an extra mile
Pray what needs prayin'
Say what needs sayin'
Cause we're only here for a little while

Today I stood singin' songs and sayin' Amen
Saying goodbye to an old friend who seemed so young
He spent his life workin' hard to chase a dollar
Putting off until tomorrow the things he should have done
Made me start thinking "What's the hurry, why the runnin'?
I don't like what I'm becoming, gonna change my style
Take my time and I take it all for granted "
Cause we're only here for a little while

Gonna hold who needs holdin'
Mend what needs mendin'
Walk what needs walkin'
Though it means an extra mile
Pray what needs prayin'
Say what needs sayin'
Cause we're only here for a little while

Let me love like I'll never see tomorrow
Treat each day as though it's borrowed
Like it's precious as a child
Whoa, take my hand
Let us reach out to each other
Cause we're only here for a little while

Gonna hold who needs holdin'
Mend what needs mendin'
Walk what needs walkin'
Though it means an extra mile
Pray what needs prayin'
Say what needs sayin'
Cause we're only here for a little while

Gonna hold who needs holdin'
Mend what needs mendin'
Walk what needs walkin'
Though it means an extra mile
Pray what needs prayin'
Say what needs sayin'
Cause we're only here for a little while

Little Drummer Boy

2009-12-21T19:08:00.003-05:00

S came home on Friday talking about the two movies he watched: Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and The Little Drummer Boy. He decided to tell us all about the movies on the way to pick Trinks up. He nailed the story of Rudolph, but came up a little short on the Drummer Boy. According to S, the drummer boy played for baby Santa. Then Santa grew up and got his suit. Hubs could barely breathe by the end of the explanation. I think have a little 'splainin' to do.

Starbucks - WTF?????

2009-12-18T04:43:00.003-05:00

I went to Starbucks yesterday because I had a coupon for a free 12 oz cup of coffee. Imagine my surprise when THEY DIDN'T HAVE STARBUCKS COFFEE!!! Apparently they only brew the crappy Pike's Place shit in the afternoon. Why do I want to go to Starbucks for weak coffee? If it's not bold and bitter, it's just not worth it. I guess it's good I don't live right near a Starbucks, not do I buy coffee often. At least it was free and there was enough cinnamon, chocolate powder, vanilla and nutmeg to hide the lack of boldness.

Life's a piece of shit....

2009-12-09T21:27:00.002-05:00

Nope - not another anti holiday rant. I'm trying not to blog cranky. Hence the silence. I am still hating the holidays, especially when Amazon refuses to leave my packages on my doorstep and makes me fetch them at the post office. If I wanted to do that, I WOULD HAVE GONE TO A STORE!!! And then another online store messed up my order and I may not have the best present available for the Hanukah party on Sunday.

But this isn't a holiday rant. S and I kind of had a special day yesterday. I picked him up to go to kung fu last night. Once again we sat on the side lines while he quaked in fear. We ran home, made sandwiches and got back in the car to eat them on the way to Brownies. We dropped Trinks off and had a great talk in the car. He let me know his favorite song is Always Look on the Bright Side of Life from Spamalot. And the reason for this is the line, "Life's a piece of shit, when you look at it". I did warn him not to sing it at school and giggled along with him. Then we got to the library and picked up the elusive #7 Magic Treehouse Sunset of the Sabertooth. We finished #6 last week, and S owns #8, but #7 was not at the library so I had to order it. I think it was the best school night he's had in a while. I will miss these days when the little things make him happy.

Idiots on Facebook

2009-12-09T21:21:00.002-05:00

And no, Mets Fan, I'm not referring to you. I have three Facebook friends from college. One I knew well, one I knew who he was, and the third I have no fucking clue who she is. Apparently the last two are getting married, but going through hell of some sort. And the first seems to be going through a crisis - perhaps divorce and/or foreclosure. I truly feel badly for them as all three seem to be going through hell. I just strenuously object to the horrifically vague crap they post on Facebook. They post dire messages asking for sympathy, prayers, etc, but they don't have any details. I really don't need to know, but the stuff they post just begs for questions, which people ask, but go unanswered. Very strange.

The last of the NYC pics

2009-12-08T21:00:00.003-05:00

Holy legos, Batman! We spent a little time at FAO.

Chewie and the kids.

Sourdough bread from Amy's Bread.

Visions of Christmas in NYC

2009-12-06T20:48:00.009-05:00

Here are some pictures from Friday in NYC. We hit the American Girl Place, Nintendo World, and the tree. I am glad I found Nintendo World so I feel less guilty about dragging S to American Girl. He's a good sport, though.

Lucky 13

2009-11-30T22:48:00.001-05:00

Hubs and I have survived 13 years together - married. It's been 18 years overall. Amazing.

My mom is the beast

2009-11-30T22:46:00.003-05:00

S has really started to sound out words and do some decent reading. He was reading sentences to me and came up with this gem. Clearly it should have been best. hehehehehe

A silver lining

2009-11-30T22:30:00.002-05:00

In decluttering yesterday, I came across 4 stained glass ornaments that get melted in the oven. The kids and I started working on ours. S made his a nice art deco snowman. Trinks make a cat coming out of a multi colored stocking and I made a Christmas tree. We must have sounded like we were having fun because hubs left the Eagles game and made a Santa face. Then we set up the inflatable Frosty, and all three trees. The kids each get a tree in their rooms and the big one goes in the office. I got a wreath tonight, so things are starting to look a little festive around here.

Stress, stress go away!!!

2009-11-29T13:42:00.002-05:00

I have been so stressed out about work that I've been having nightmares. Bad timing, now that we're getting into the holiday season - a season I have hated for years. This weekend I have been tackling some of the issues of why I am stressed out and I seem to be winning. I did a lot of holiday shopping online and I am prety much done. Hubs has to get his presents, but this year I am checking to see if he shopped BEFORE we get in the car so I won't be embarassed when he has nothing.

I think the best thing I did this weekend was to pull out tons of crap and box it up for Goodwill. I am about to head upstairs and get more stuff out of Trinks' room. I even parted with BOOKS! Three boxes worth. I can probably fill 10 more boxes, and I'm pretty excited about getting these dust collectors out of my house. I just feel like I am suffocating and stuff has to go. I have challenged myself to removing 1/2 of our possessions this year. We did it in the living room and it is by far the easiest room to take care of. I look forward to paring down to the bare necessities. I'll try not to beat myself up about buying stupid things - apple peeler slicer corer, anyone? - and just get rid of it. What isn't appropriate for Goodwill will go in the trash. Things like good china will be sold on E Bay. If I haven't used something in the last 1-3 years, it goes. I feel better and I can breathe better. The stress is leaving my body.

Well, break is over. Back to packing up the crap!

Trinks' next weapon

2009-11-26T10:52:00.001-05:00

Can you picture Trinks swinging this???? Class starts next week!!!

I want pizza for Thanksgiving

2009-11-23T21:43:00.002-05:00

S mentioned he wanted pizza for Thanksgiving dinner. We ended up getting pizza for dinner tonight for two reasons. First, he's an only child for the week and deserves a couple of perks. Second, we passed a pizza shop that had pizza for $5.99 on Mondays. So we ordered the pizza, hit the library (we desperately needed the 5th Magic Treehouse), and then picked up the pizza. I advised him that now he has to eat turkey for Thanksgiving.

Where I want to be

2009-11-21T19:32:00.001-05:00

Instead, I put the mattress warmer on and set it to stun.

Trinks got her ears pierced!

2009-11-21T17:42:00.001-05:00

S turned 5 on vacation

2009-11-17T21:34:00.006-05:00

I can't believe my baby is 5! We celebrated with a Mario birthday party. Yes, I ordered Luigi cake plates and mushroom napkins to bring with us. He got Mario Kart for his DS from my in laws, and I picked up some small Mario things, like action figures and a stylus.

And S celebrated with a drink with his cousin. We had dinner at the Poop Deck (ok - laugh, get it out of your system). It was fabulous.

The US Preventive Task Force is made up of morons

2009-11-17T21:08:00.007-05:00

And, apparently, not of oncologists. Fuck them. This team of 16 idiots, came to conclusion that mammograms do not save enough women, so they don't believe women without a risk factor should get mammograms. For every 1900 mammograms, only 1 woman's life is saved. That's just dandy if you are one of the 1900. But if you are the ONE, it freaking sucks. It means people like Kathi are more likely to die because they won't get a mammogram. She didn't know she had cancer until it appeared on her routine mammogram. There were no other signs. So she was the ONE in 1900, and I am grateful every day that I still have her in my life. I am NOT willing to lose a friend because the US Preventive task force believes their lives aren't worth anything.

Am I going to rely on this uneducated group to dictate my health? FUCK NO! I'll be getting squished in the next few months. I think I go in December. I don't care if I have to lie about risk to get insurance to pay for it. It's necessary. There are too many people I know who have breast cancer (prayers and happy thoughts to NJ teacher's mother who had a very successful surgery and is now waiting to hear the staging and treatment plan). Early detection is key to successful treatment of this disease. In defiance of this study (which I am sure was funded by insurance companies) I am checking my boobs EVERY DAY. Peace of mind is more important that some unqualified dr's opinion. Join my movement and check the girls, the ta tas, boobs, melons, breasts, whatever you want to call them, EVERY DAY. Heck - check someone else's boobs for a change of pace. JUST CHECK THEM!! STAY SAFE!! Your life is important to ME.